When I reached out to Jamie about doing a shoot, I was pushing myself outside of my comfort zone. I was nervous to even send the message. I’d always heard that boudoir shoots can help with self-esteem, but I didn’t understand how I would get myself to look like that in front of other people. As soon as I sent the message, Jamie reassured me that she had some of the same struggles and would do what she could to help me along the way. I immediately felt more at ease.
I have been body shamed all my life by family, friends, peers and even strangers. This has turned me….into my biggest critic. I didn’t see the beautiful that has been pointed out to me by a man that is my biggest supporter. When I shared my worries with Jamie, she was understanding and encouraging. I felt like we had an instant connection…like she could be one of my good friends.
I currently lead a small group through my church where we help each other through our womanly struggles. Negative self-talk, body positivity, life struggles…the common issues that we as women face. Not only did I want to do this for me, but I wanted to do it to hopefully help them as well.
The day of my shoot, I did a lot of praying and asking God to let this experience help me. I’ve worked hard on digging myself out of the darkness after an abusive relationship. I’ve spent a lot of time on understanding me and my own struggles…but I NEED to be able to love me as a whole. And THAT was what I was doing this for.
When I first arrived, Jamie met me at the door and I immediately loved her! She introduced me to Raul (he’s totally laid back and super calm). We talked about limits and what I was comfortable with. They explained how they would respect any of my wishes and that Jamie was available to help me with any wardrobe issues and such. The whole time I was there, I felt like I was with people that I’ve known forever! We laughed and talked through the shoot. I left there and felt like there was a weight that had lifted. I actually felt beautiful.
The reveal came and I was so nervous to walk in and see all of those flaws that I focus on ever single day. Raul and Jamie were wonderful once again. We started looking at the pictures and yes, I saw some that I wanted to look away from. But ultimately….they were amazing. I was flabbergasted. I looked attractive. I SAW the beautiful that my guy has been telling me existed.
I will forever be grateful to Jamie and Raul for this opportunity. I will now be able to look at these photos when I am struggling and remind myself that there is beauty there that I’ve never allowed myself to see. If you are struggling with the cost or the fear of being vulnerable in front of strangers….DO IT AFRAID. Jamie and Raul have helped me see myself in a different way. YOU DESERVE TO DO THE SAME FOR YOURSELF!